Life of an Imp

When Aerys reigned,

The mad dragon king;
At Casterely Rock,
That’s where I was born.

A dwarf lion,
Shamed my sire;
‘No son of mine,’ he’d exclaimed.
‘Kin slayer,’ cried my sister.

Jaime, my dear big brother,
He loathed me not;
But, he drifted away,
To don the white.

At 13, I fell in love,
With a Crofter’s daughter;
We married, shared bed,
Ah! Until father found out.

A slut she was or was she?
But I believed my brother.
She was raped, and I watched,
Even showered her with silver.

Books and wine.
Were now my kin.
Infamous for whoring,
Became this monster Imp.

When Cercei wedded stag,
I visited King’s landing.
In dungeons, they were, dragon skulls,
Oh! How fascinated I was.

Years later, I went north
Pissed from top of the wall.
Unfortunately, Starks accused me,
For an attempt to murder their ward.

My greatest strength, my ‘wits’
Won me freedom, and
An outspoken sell sword;
Along with northern mountain clans.

‘Serve, in my stead, as hand,’
Commanded my father.
With my men & my whore
I was back in the capital.

I played the game, restored order;
Bitch slapped & cursed my king.
But above all, my wildfire trick
Saved the throne & the city.

And what was my reward?
Marriage alliance with Starks?
Yes, those whom we butchered,
In the infamous ‘Red Wedding.’

Seventy six meals, they served,
At ‘Purple Wedding.’
And countless japes humiliated me,
But, I had the last laugh.

My beloved sister accused me,
For kin slaying and regicide.
My father smelled an opportunity,
To get rid of the cursed ‘lion’.

The trial was a mummer’s farce,
That I knew from start.
So, giving up my fate to gods;
I demanded trial by combat.

Who shall fight the mountain?
Not Jaime, neither did Bronn.
At last, became my champion,
The ‘Red Viper’ from Dorne.

My heart beat furiously,
As my formidable foe collapsed.
To my horror, breath stopped;
As oberyn’s skull was smashed.

A headless dwarf, I was to be
At the break of sunlight.
But ‘Spider’ and my brother,
Had notions otherwise.

Before leaving the wretched city,
I slit my whore’s throat.
Also I murdered my sire,
Realised, the Lannister didn’t shat gold.

With hope for life and westeros
I headed to Mereen,
The bear Mormont kidnapped me,
As a gift for his beloved queen.

The wise Targereyan,
Made me her advisor.
I won her confidence, her people;
And three large living dragons.

Now with the greatest army in the realm,
We head to seize the throne.
With a few scores to settle,
I look forward to meet my foes.

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